


What Else?

by theoofoof



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode: s07e21 Institutional Memory, F/M, post-ep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:15:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22910848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theoofoof/pseuds/theoofoof
Summary: Picks up during the final scene of 7x21: Institutional Memory and continues from there. CJ/Danny.
Relationships: Danny Concannon/C. J. Cregg
Comments: 7
Kudos: 42





	What Else?

**Author's Note:**

> This is completely unbeta'd so apologies for any errors.

CJ let out a deep breath as the door opened and she came face to face with Danny for the first time since their argument. He allowed the Secret Service agent to enter and they stood silently either side of the threshold while the agent swept Danny’s apartment. She hugged her arms to her chest, trying not to look at the man she’d unintentionally hurt earlier that day. But she could feel his questioning gaze so lifted her eyes to meet his. Only for a second – it was too much for her to deal with out there in the hallway in front of her security detail – so she quickly looked away only to find her gaze pulled back to him moments later.

The agent returned and thanked Danny, and CJ wordlessly crossed the threshold into his apartment, heading straight for his kitchen. Danny followed, taking a sip of his drink, before giving her his full attention. He didn’t push her though. He’d learnt that lesson. He waited for her to find the words.

She exhaled slowly, fiddling with the belt on her coat. “I missed the window,” she announced. “That's what's going on here. I missed the window to figure out how to do this.

“How to…?” He wasn’t exactly sure why she was here. She’d made it pretty clear at lunch that she didn’t see him as part of her future. What was she trying to say?

“Share my life with another person. How to be a partner or whatever condescending way you put it this afternoon.”

“I wasn't trying–”

“I don't know how to do it.”

Danny raised an eyebrow at that statement, but she ignored him, continuing with the monologue she’d rehearsed in the car on the way over.

“Maybe at one point I did, maybe I never did, but it's over now. It's too late. This and skiing, it's too late. It's not gonna happen.”

“C.J.–” He let the skiing comment pass by – he didn’t know where it had come from, but it wasn’t important now.

“You said yourself it's not an accident that this hasn't come together. This is who I am. I'm good at my job, Danny. I'm good at working. I'm not good at this.”

“You're right. You suck at it.” He wasn’t going to lie to her – she wasn’t the easiest person to try and have a relationship with. Some of that was down to her job, but there was a lack of experience there too. She’d spent so much time focusing on her career, that she’d never really had to do it before. “You're gonna need a tremendous amount of training.”

“You're not gonna–”

“I am, actually.”

“–Train me?!”

“Well, I'll call it something else, that sounds bad, but we'll deal with it.”

“I don't need training,” she protested.

He shook his head and looked at the floor. Her stubbornness infuriated him at times. “No, of course not.”

“That's not funny.”

“No, it isn't.” He approached her slowly, stopping about a foot away. “You're gonna get good at it,” he told her. “ _We're_ gonna get good at new things.”

“You don't know that.”

“I do.”

“Don't make it sound like it's nothing.”

“You didn't miss it.”

“What if I did?”

“You didn't miss it,” he repeated.

“What if we can't–?”

“We'll figure it out. All of it.”

She sighed, unsure how he could be so sure.

Danny continued, “You can be scared. That's okay. But you're not gonna walk away from me because you're scared. I'm not that scary.”

He was, but she held her tongue, looking down at the floor as she considered his words and those of one of her oldest friends had said to her less than an hour before. Toby had told her to pick something; asked her what she wanted and the first thing that came to mind was Danny. She’d wanted him for years, but she’d spent so much time doing her job – being damn good at her job – that she really was scared that she wouldn’t know how to have a successful relationship. Hearing him say that it was alright to be scared and the confidence with which he talked about them learning together, gave her pause. Maybe it was time for her to stop bouncing and take the leap.

She took her hands out of her pockets and tightened the belt on her coat once more as she attempted to fix the mess she’d made of their fledgling relationship. “So, do you want me to take,” she wrung her hands as she spoke – letting people in was not something she had a lot of experience with, “one of the board of directors jobs? It’s only a couple of hours a month.”

“Where the hell did that come from?”

His reaction took her back slightly and her heart sank. This was what he wanted, wasn’t it? For her to involve him in the discussion. But it seemed she had made another mess of it. She had told him she was no good at this. “I'm trying!” she exclaimed, her exasperation clear. “You wanna be involved. I’m–”

He shook his head. “I want you to do what you want. Take the job at the White House. I just want you to talk to me about it. I want us to talk about what it'll mean, and how it'll work. I want us to talk like we're gonna figure it out together. I want us to talk because I like the sound of your voice. I just wanna talk.”

She stared at him as he spoke, her heart pounding. He’d told her at lunch that he didn’t want to make any decisions for her, but she hadn’t really heard him – she’d been focussed on the budget and transition memos as well as reeling from Santos’ offer. She could hear him now though. He was talking about a real relationship; an equal partnership. He wanted her to do what she wanted but asking that she took some consideration of how that would affect that partnership. As she thought about it, CJ realised that Danny was the first person since this whole period of transition started, who’d told her to do what she wanted. Everyone had tried to influence her; Margaret, Charlie, even the President himself, but no one had considered what she wanted. She wasn’t sure she’d even begun to consider it herself. Maybe talking about it would help.

Her voice was quiet as she spoke. “Franklin Hollis wants me to take $10 billion and go and fix the world.”

His eyes widened; she’d alluded earlier that it had been a good offer and she was right. “That sounds like fun. Does that sound like fun to you?”

He took a step towards her, his eyes searching, and after a moment she gave a tentative nod. Doing some actual good in the world; not being stifled by congress at every turn sounded too good to be true, but here she was, being given an opportunity to do just that.

“Do you wanna work at the White House?” he asked. He wasn’t going to be a reporter – there wouldn’t be a conflict of interest anymore. If working for Santos’ was what CJ really wanted, then they’d find a way to make it work. It wouldn’t be easy, but he’d try. But even now, he wasn’t sure it was what she wanted.

CJ stared at him. There it was. The million-dollar question.

She’d given eight years of her life to that place, almost ten if you counted the campaign trail. Did she want to give another two? Maybe more? Or did she want to move on and build a life with the man who had loved her for most of that time, despite the roadblocks she put in their way?

She shook her head. Hesitantly at first, but then with slightly more confidence. Danny smiled at her and she couldn’t help but return it. She felt tears of relief gather in her eyes and, looking at the floor, she blinked them away, swallowing the emotion for now.

“There's a typo in the Constitution,” she told him, raising her head.

Over the past few weeks, Danny had gotten used to CJ flitting between topics. He understood that it was because her brilliant mind was dealing with so many things at once, so he just rolled with it, replying with a glib, “Well, someone should look into that.”

“Toby's gonna deal with it.”

“Okay. What else?”

Silence fell over them for a moment, the two of them staring at each other. “That’s… that’s a big question.”

“We got time. Let’s sit down, have a drink. Talk.”

She nodded, unfastening the belt she’d been tugging at since she arrived and shrugged her coat off her shoulders. If they were going to unpick this all now, which it seemed they were – although she had no idea where to start - she may as well be comfortable.

Danny reached for it and laid it over the breakfast bar. “Wine?” He gestured to the fridge. “I think there’s some left from the other night.”

She shook her head. “Maybe just some water. I think this should be a conversation had with a clear head.”

Danny nodded. “Go on through and make yourself comfortable. I’ll be there in a minute.” He turned on the faucet, allowing the water to run cold and grabbed a glass from the drainer. He filled it and carried it through to the living room, picking up on his own drink on the way past.

He turned to corner to find CJ reclined on the sofa, her stocking feet propped up on the coffee table and her eyes closed. His mouth quirked into a smile, pleased to see she felt comfortable enough to relax in his apartment, despite the heavy conversation that was awaiting them.

She felt the sofa shift as he joined her and opened her eyes, taking the glass he held out to her. “Thanks.”

“You spoke to Toby?” While Danny was eager to get on with their conversation, he knew how close she and Toby had been and how much recent developments had affected her and wanted to give her time and space to talk about that too if she wanted. “How is he?”

“He’s… coping. Andy came by to see me today. She asked me about a Presidential pardon. I wanted to see what he thought about the idea.”

“And?”

“He needs a frying pan to the side of his head.”

Danny smiled. “He didn’t go for it, then?”

“That’s putting it mildly.”

“So, he’s not going to apply. That doesn’t mean it won’t happen. The President can still add his own names,” Danny reminded her.

“Yeah. Maybe.” She didn’t want to get her hopes up. The President was beyond pissed and hurt at what Toby had done. So was she. But that didn’t mean she wanted to see one of her oldest friends go to prison. Nor did she want to talk about this now. “Can we not talk about that?”

“Okay. What should we talk about then?”

She took another sip of her water, allowing herself a moment to gather her thoughts. “I think I’m beginning to understand how you felt at our dinner the other last month. It feels like time for heroic postures…” They shared a small smile at the memory. “But, outside of the political arena, I’m not very good at those.”

He reached over and placed his hand over hers where it sat on the couch between them. “You can do it,” he reassured her, mirroring her words from a month ago.

She turned her hand over in his and interlaced their fingers. “I’m probably gonna fumble it a bit.”

“That’s okay.”

She paused, taking a breath. “You were right, I am scared. But not of you. Earlier…” she swirled her water around gently in her glass, “…at lunch… you asked me if I saw you in my future and I didn’t answer you. But that wasn’t because I don’t see you there. The truth is… I can’t see _anything_ past the end of this administration. I can’t even remember what life outside the White House looks like and that’s…”

“Scary.”

She chuckled. “Yeah. This job is all I’ve known for eight years. Everyone’s been talking about ‘after inauguration’ but it was a bit of an abstract concept until this morning when I walked into my office to find it being packed up. I think it finally hit me that in two weeks it’ll all be over.”

Danny nodded, the pieces slotting together in his head. “And then along comes Matt Santos with an opportunity for you to stay…”

“Institutional memory. It’s a powerful thing. I was tempted because that life… it’s all I know. It’s… safe. But I also know there’s more out there. I just don’t know how to get it… beyond actually walking out of the door in two weeks.”

“Well, walking out of the door is certainly a good place to start,” Danny quipped. “Tell me more about Hollis’ offer.”

“He’s starting a foundation and wants to find a single problem to solve. He thinks I’d have a unique perspective on what that could be and how to solve it.”

“And do you?”

“Infrastructure in developing countries. Highways, plumbing, that sort of thing.”

Danny mulled it over. “Hmm, that’s not a bad call. Most aid projects fail because of transportation issues, and it’s not an area that gets a lot of attention.”

She nodded. “Which is pretty much what I told Franklin Hollis. He jumped on board pretty quickly.” 

“That’s my girl.”

“ _Your_ girl?” she asked, side-eyeing him.

“Yeah. You got a problem with that?” He raised an eyebrow, challenging her to argue.

She chewed her bottom lip for a moment but couldn’t maintain the façade for long. “No.” A smile crept onto her face and she shook her head. “It actually sounds quite nice.”

He lifted their joined hands and gently tugged her nearer. “C’mere.”

Putting her glass down on the table, she shifted closer to him, drawing her legs onto the sofa. Danny put his arm around her, and she sighed as she settled into the crook of his arm.

“Can I make a suggestion?” Danny stroked gentle patterns on her arm as he spoke.

“Go for it.” 

“After you’ve walked out the door of that glorious palace on Pennsylvania Avenue, why don’t we get away for a while?”

She craned her neck, meeting his eyes. “Get away? You mean like a vacation?”

“Yeah, you know that thing the dictionary defines as _‘a time when someone does not go to work or school but is free to do what they want, such as travel or relax’_.” He smirked and CJ dug him in the ribs.

“Ow!”

She smiled. “It’s been a while, but I think I vaguely remember the concept. You have somewhere in mind?”

He shrugged. “I’d offer to take you skiing, but I’ve tried that, and it was not the roaring success I’d hoped it would be. I was thinking somewhere warm. You can lie by a pool or on a beach, lose yourself in the latest trashy romance novel, work on your tan, y’know? Relax. Decompress. Figure out what you want to do. You don’t have to plan out the next ten years of your life right away.”

“And while I’m doing all that, how will you be spending your time?”

“Helping you. Being with you. We’ll use that time to learn more about each other, work on being together. Also, I’ll woo you.”

“ _Woo_ me?”

“Yeah, buy you flowers, gifts, take you on dates. Wine and dine you. Make up for the last eight years.”

“It was hardly your fault. I feel I was responsible for the lack of dates over the course of our _relationship_.”

“Well, I suppose technically speaking, you were, but I understand why that was the case. You’ll say yes in future, right?”

“Yes.”

“So, any particular destination you’d like to visit?”

She was silent for a moment, her fingers toying with v-neck of his jumper. She’d travelled to a lot of countries with the president but hadn’t seen much of any of them in between press briefings and meetings. She had a list as long as her arm of places she’d said she’d go back to, but at this moment there was only one at the forefront of her mind. The place she’d called home for several years before joining the _Bartlet for America_ Campaign.

“I always thought about returning to California, see how the place has changed. Although the weather in January isn’t particularly conducive to tanning.”

“We could stay out there until the weather improves…” Danny suggested. “Did Hollis mention any kind of time frame or deadlines?”

“No.” she pushed herself back into a sitting position, her eyes wide. “I don’t even know where his foundation is based. How could I not have asked that question?”

Danny chuckled lightly. It was nice to see she could still get flustered. For her job, she had to project a calm, unflappable air, but it was good to know that the CJ he fell in love with still existed. “Your mind was probably a little preoccupied with the $10 billion dollars.”

She craned her neck to look at him. “But we can’t make any decisions without all the pertinent information.”

A smile spread over Danny’s face.

“What?” CJ asked.

“You said ‘we’.”

It took her a moment to realise what he was talking about but when she did, she smiled too and gave a light shrug. “You want to be involved…” she explained. “And if I’m going to be based… well anywhere that’s a significant distance from D.C., doesn’t that seem like something we should talk about?”

“Oh, definitely. But it doesn’t have to be tonight. Although, as it’s come up, I should say this: I’m not tied to D.C. I can be wherever you need to be.”

“Playing Mr C.J. Cregg?”

His words didn’t surprise her. After his speech in the restaurant about holding hands as they jumped off a cliff, she was fairly sure he was in this relationship for the long haul. Her heart still fluttered on hearing them though.

Danny shrugged. “If that’s what it takes.”

“To be with me?” He nodded. “That hardly seems fair on you.”

“Oh, I don’t know, the reward’s worth more than the sacrifices.”

“Even with the amount of training I need?”

He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. “Even then.”

Smiling, she lay her head back on his shoulder. “Have you had any thoughts as to what you might do now you’ve left journalistic reporting behind?”

He’d resigned from the paper after the election, disillusioned with the direction the profession was heading in but hadn’t been sure about what he wanted to do. But she was sure a mind like Danny’s would have run through several scenarios.

“I have a couple of irons in the fire. But nothing too pressing.”

“Anything jumping out at you?”

He took a sip of his drink. “My publishers are asking for a sequel to my book about the First Lady.”

“ _Abigail Bartlet: The White House Years_?” CJ suggested.

“Something like that. Think she’d go for it?”

“Maybe but I’d give it a couple of months before you ask. They need time to decompress.”

“See, I was thinking you could test the waters for me. With her and the President.”

“Oh no. If I’ve learnt anything over the past nine years, it’s not to get in the middle of their marriage. If you want this deal, you’re on your own.”

“Coward,” he teased, kissing her temple and she laughed. It was a sound Danny could only hope to hear more of in future.

“About Hollis’ offer…”

Danny cut her off. “CJ, stop worrying about that for tonight. Please. You’ve got time. _We’ve_ got time.”

“I know. I was just going to say I’ll have Margaret to schedule a call for me tomorrow, so I can talk through some details with him. Maybe we could get together afterwards and discuss it?”

“My sister’s in town tomorrow night, remember?”

“Oh, that’s right. Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Besides, aren’t you finalising the budget?”

“We are. I won’t make dinner, but I could meet you and your sister for a late drink. If the offer’s still on the table?”

“Of course. She’s dying to meet you.”

“Oh, don’t say that! I’ll spend all day tomorrow worrying about what she’ll think of me now.”

He smirked. “She’ll love you,” he promised. _Like I do._ The words were on the tip of his tongue, but he held them back for now. _After the inauguration_ , he told himself.

She smiled up at him. “I hope you’re right. Just let me know where you decide to eat, and I’ll try not to keep you waiting too long.”

He tightened his arm around her and placed a kiss on her forehead. “No pressure. Get there when you can.”

“Okay.” She leaned further into him, nuzzling his neck. “This is nice.” They didn’t often get to do this. Danny had hit the nail on the head that afternoon when he said they were mainly together from 11 pm to 6 am. They made love and slept, with the occasional dinner thrown in. But times like this, where they could just be together in the moment, were rare.

“Yeah, it is.” Balancing his drink on the arm of the sofa, Danny reached for the remote and switched on the stereo. The two of them sat curled up together, listening to the sweet strains of smooth jazz mixed with the sounds of the city outside. After a few minutes, Danny noticed CJ’s breathing had begun to even out.

He reached out and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “CJ?”

“Mmm?” It took her a moment to return to the present. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep. It’s been a long day.”

“And I’ll bet you’ve not eaten much either?” Their lunch plans had gone awry and he knew her well enough to know that she’d forgo food if she got into a deep enough issue or crisis.

“I didn’t really feel like it,” she admitted. She’d felt incredibly guilty about their lunchtime argument and that, coupled with the worry of how she was going to make it right again, had her stomach doing summersaults all afternoon, making it easy to forget to eat while she was combing through the budget.

“You want me to rustle up something?”

She shook her head. “Maybe in the morning.”

“ _Definitely_ in the morning,” he agreed, mentally cataloguing the contents of his fridge. He would see she was properly fed before she left for work. “I take it you’re staying then?”

“If you don’t mind?”

“Not at all. Want me to let the guys know?” he nodded to the door. “And go get your bag?”

She sat up, stretching. “Please.”

He stood and went to the door. As she reached for her water, she heard him telling her secret service detail that they were “in for the night” and asking if it would be okay for him to retrieve her bag from the limo. As the front door closed behind him, she downed the rest of her drink, hoping the refreshing liquid would wake her up a little, then headed to the bedroom.

When Danny had returned, he found her sat on what had quickly become her side of the bed, staring into space. He approached slowly, not wanting to startle her, and placed her bag on the bed next to her. She smiled her thanks and he dropped a kiss to the top of her head before returning to the living area to secure the apartment for the night. CJ opened her bag and began to remove several items. Her cell phone and pager went on the nightstand, her hairbrush and washbag took up their place on the vanity in the bathroom and her outfit for the next day was hung on the closet door.

“Remind me in the morning to tell Margaret I’m running low on spare outfits,” she called into the apartment as she returned to the bathroom to begin her nightly routine.

“I have no objection to you walking around naked,” Danny called back, switching off the stereo.

She laughed. “No, but I doubt it would go down well at work.”

“Oh, I don’t know. It’s one way to get the votes you need,” he replied, stepping into the bathroom behind her as she liberally applied moisturiser to her face. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed down her neck to her collarbone, his lips grazing her skin lightly.

She turned in his arms and raised a hand to cup his cheek. She leaned forward and captured his lips in a soft, loving kiss that lasted a few moments before they pulled back with matching smiles on their faces.

There was a warmth and a lightness in CJ’s chest that she hadn’t felt in a long time and she knew, despite the discussions that still awaited them, that choosing Danny had been the right decision. They had been dancing around each other for eight years, their feelings held captive by their professional obligations. Obligations that no longer existed. CJ was already beginning to imagine what their future together could be… and she liked what she saw. The thought of leaving behind the world she knew so well and moving forward with Danny still scared her, but alongside the fear something deeper had sparked and begun to blossom. It was a bit like the first bloom of spring after a bitter, cold winter. Bright and full of promise.

And as she allowed herself to be swept away by another, more passionate kiss – his fingers in her hair, the weight of his body pressing her back against the vanity - she thought maybe she hadn’t missed the window after all.


End file.
